I feel like I’m disappearing. Any identity I once had is gone and I’m left not knowing who I am or how to restore the strong person I once was. It’s like I’ve given up. I fought for so much of my life pre-illnesses that now dealing with this nightmare of illnesses is too much for my brain and emotions to handle. I wish I could be that optimist that realizes a positive attitude is key but I’d be lying if I said I am able to do that. I am a negative Nancy. I’m stuck. And I’m too tired to get unstuck. So then that leaves me feeling flat out miserable.